Darkness rising

I have been down some dark and demon like roads and pathways in life. Trying to search for a way to find myself. Take away the pain and anguish. I have crushed alot of that pavement, rock, sand and grass searching ways to come out of the darkness that used to rock my world. Conquer them ? Fight with them ? Stop the motion ? I tried it all and kept failing and falling into darker circles and darker rooms. Rooms filled with endless thoughts of being lost. Always asking myself if I strong, will I ever be strong, will I conquer anything deep with in. The will to fight for life and push was my always my will. No matter our will we will fail and fall. I did many times looking up to others who have had their mind under control, their lives and etc. I wanted it and kept pushing for it. Now I have found that comfy place in my mind that takes me away from it all. Pushing me to a place where I am at in my head. Where life feels right and I will be able to encourage more to come out of the Darkness and fulfill their lives with happiness and push out the darkness. In reality it dont matter how much we push and get everything under control. We hit points in life where we will fall back into darkness. But after we learn to come out of it once. We not only have experienced the darkness. But now have an idea how to take ourselves into the light again. Motivation with in is there and will ALWAYS come back. Keeping your head up and wanting, needing and looking for more will always take you from the darkness that over rides us. I searched endless days, afternoons and evenings searching for a hug, hoping that it would take it all away. Sadly in the end it was up to me to find me. Never be shy to step forward solo and take control of your thoughts, heart and life. ©Rudi Jensen